HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

"Dr. Jones' office, can I help you today? Excuse me for saying 'today'. The earliest we could possibly see you would be December. Before we make you an appointment I will need to ask you a few questions. I hope you have insurance because if you don't, I will have to turn you into the IRS. The first offense I believe is 2500 dollars. I f this is your second offense, you may receive up to six months in jail. I'm not sure of the details, but I thought you should be informed..Oh you have insurance, that's great.

I only have a few more questions. How old are you? 66, oh."

"Why did you say oh?"

"Well if you are 66, you must be on medicare"

"So"

"Well I thought you said you have insurance."

"Isn't medicare insurance?"

The receptionist can hardly control her laughter.

"Medicare is insurance like monopoly money is money. Do you know anyone who will take monopoly money in payment for a bill you owe? "

" I have good news for you, there are no more questions to answer. You probably ought to look for a burial policy instead of a doctor. Have a great day...click"